“Americans are stupid” says Australian who punched on over toilet paper

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Tim Jones

A Glebe man has caused a stir on social media after his recent criticism of the riots in the US took a turn for the worse.

Daniel Johnson, 27, had made a multitude of stunning and brave posts on Facebook criticising the US as a ‘violent and dysfunctional society’ and saying that he “stood in solidarity with the protestors.”

However, one astute commenter recognised Johnson from a recent video uploaded during the toilet paper wars at Coles, where Johnson got into a fight with an elderly gentleman over the last package of Sorbent.

Harvard University Professor Jack Jackson pointed out that sneering at Americans has always been part of the Australian psyche.

“It’s really just a form of psychological projection of insecurity. Sure, America has its issues and we’ve never claimed to be perfect. However, we won’t take shit from an island nation that based its economy off of selling debt and real estate to each other and is basically China’s bitch. How about we pull our military bases from Australia and the Pacific and let China have at the region?”

“Sure, Australia has some great things but it’s really just a bunch of hypocritical bourgeois sneering from some middle-class wankers with their feet up in front of their TV’s. They apparently hate the US but they express it on Facebook and Twitter, while buying some crap off Amazon and watching Netflix docos all day.”

Johnson has since de-activated his social media profiles and hasn’t been heard from since.

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