Since Yassmin Abdel-Magied burst on the scene, poor Wally has been suffering a mild case of Sudden insignificance Syndrome. Celebrities have been known to resort to drastic measures when hit with this affliction. Thus to avert a potential Waleed Aly sex-tape, our resident poet has penned the following ditty:
Pretty Wally: To the tune of Pretty Woman
Waleed Aly, banging on your drum,
Waleed Aly, every jihadists’ chum,
Waleed Aly, I don’t believe you can speak the truth
No one can talk more shit than you.
Waleed Aly, the crap you speak.
Waleed Aly, just makes you reek
Waleed Aly of porky pies topped with bacon
‘Cause you are the king of fakin’
Waleed Aly stop awhile,
Give us a rest from your taqiyya smiles
Stop spreading ‘round your verbal piles
Don’t be a taqiyya tart all your life
Hiding behind the scarf of your wife
Open your eyes to your words of strife and see-ee
That no one, likes you
Or the crap that you’re preaching,
Just give it a rest,
Stuff your taqiyya teaching
Waleed Aly, you’re a Moslem flog
Waleed Aly, call off your lying dog
Waleed Aly; just walk awayayay
Just go and don’t come back
‘Cause with you we’ve had the jack
Why can’t you see???
If you were on fire I wouldn’t pee
On youuuuu, oh, Waleed Aly.
Photo by cedarsx