A new scientific study has confirmed that the current number of known varieties of gender, 365,000 in all, are so numerous, that if they were laid down side by side, they could be ‘seen from space.’ Published in the prestigious journal Science, under the title, ‘The known trans-universe: Demystifying trans-social attitudes to phenomenology and trans-epistemology regarding the solidification of patriarchal structures of trans-trans-gender,’ the article proves the existence of massive constellations of previously unknown genders, and points to the possibility of many more.
A member of the Australian Greens has stated that although the study is ‘encouraging,’ ze still feels excluded by such a conservatively low figure. ‘This is definitely a step in the right direction, but it shows that we, as a society, still have a very long way to go.’
The Greens member stated that ze would like to see much greater funding for future exploration of gender varieties, saying it would need to be in the realm of ‘hundreds of billions of dollars.’ Asked where the money for such research could come from, The XYZ was informed that ‘we spend far too much money on national defence and men’s health, and we could still appropriate far greater wealth from the kulak classes.’
Some of the astronomical numbers put forth in the new study truly are huge. For example, it is calculated that if every human being who ever lived was to spend each second of their life discovering one new gender, we would still have only discovered 0.000001% of all genders currently believed to possibly exist. Another way of putting this, is that if you stacked all the genders, both known and unknown, on top of each other, they would stretch half the distance from Earth to Pluto. An unnamed source involved in the study told The XYZ, “It’s the sort of thing which makes you realise just how insignificant you are, and why we really should have your liver… and you should pay higher taxes.”
We asked the Greens member if ze still held out hope that one day, scientists would discover a gender which was just right for zer. At this, ze was adamant – ‘I believe it is somewhere out there.’
It’s your XYZ.