I got hungry in a place called ol’ Wuhan’
Where they dress like girls and they’re all called Tran-
Svestites, tee are ay ens vestites.
One walked up to me like a slinky cat
And asked if I was hungry for Wuhan bat
So I said no! En oh en oh oh no.
Well I don’t wear the world’s most smartest hat,
But I know you don’t eat raw Wuhan bat
And I said so, you know I said so.
Well I got here just a week ago
But I hate raw bats and I wanna go;
Home to Oz so far away
But now I’ve got a cough and I gotta stay!
And the girls over here are frightfully strong
If I didn’t know better, I’d say there’s something wrong
‘Cause they eat cats, maybe even raw bats!
I threw back the bat; at the girl called Tran
She’s got hairy legs, and I think she’s a man!
So I decided then and there;
That eating bats bring you no joys
Especially if it turns girls into bruising boys
And I wanna go, please let me home Scomo!
Promise you I’ll self-isolate
And I’ll never ever put a raw bat on my plate
It’s a no-no, en oh en oh no no.
But that big Chinese girl won’t go away
Like my nasty fever she’s here to stay,
And over me; she wants to watch
But I don’t trust that huge bulge in her crotch!
So stay within your borders and we’ll all be fine
And on strange filthy animals, please don’t dine
Or we’ll all die!