Pakistan beat Pakistan at World Cup

5

An English side that was refreshingly 9/11ths British lost last night in a World Cup upset to Pakistan.

The hit & giggle fake version of cricket is always open to the surprise win by an inferior side because it is all over in a day or less. In Test cricket, ie real cricket, there is always the second innings and four more days. Hence the unpredictability of ODI’s. The World Cup is regularly a prime chance for third world nations to get one over the first world nations they are reverse colonising.

This report in the Australian has a good summary of just how poor Pakistan’s form was and just how good England’s form was going into this match before the predictably unpredictable happened. Being the Murdoch Murdoch Murdoch press, there is one factor it is not supposed to mention in explaining why England lost. We here at The XYZ are not supposed to mention it either, but hey, we never let that stop us.

Here is footage of the match highlights:

Joe Root must be at least in his mid 40’s by now, but he still looks like a cherub. Anyway, what one will notice is that the crowd noise is roughly equal in support for each side. The match may as well be in the Pashtun rather than the Midlands. This is now par for the course whenever an English or Australian cricket side plays a team from the subcontinent in England or Australia.

We no longer have home games.

Check out this footage from Melbourne in 2016:

Funny how all those Indian Australians turn out to be Indian Indians whenever Australia plays India. Great nations don’t die. They just go brown.

Compare this to the crowd in Trafalgar Square which celebrated England’s regaining of the Ashes in 2005:

All those pasty faces and pale arms. It was 14 years ago but it still hurts.

But hang on.. look at all those pasty faces and pale arms. That was only 14 years ago. Now, London has fallen.

With the capital lost, the invaders are fanning out across the countryside. Here is a table showing the demographic shift of Nottingham, home of England’s Trent Bridge loss.

Source, Wikipedia.

The proportion of white people in Nottingham dropped from 85% in 2001 to 71.5% in 2011. This is Robin-Hood-Little-John-Friar-Tuck-Maid-Marian-Friggin-Nottingham we’re talking about here.

They’ll be lucky to be in the 50’s in 2021.