Rigged: Waleed Aly has been Cheated

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He plays guitar so Muslims must be cool.

It’s fair to say that both I and some of the readers here at XYZ have been speculating on how long Waleed Aly will have to wait before being awarded Australian of the Year.

After all, as I’m sure you will agree, he is beyond a perfect candidate.

If one studies the previous winners of this prestigious trophy, the pattern clearly favours the soft-speaking presenter of Channel 10’s premier prime time evening vehicle for news and entertainment.

This past year’s award winner was the retired Lieutenant-General David Morrison, a man who has carried himself always with dignity, never behaving in such a manner as to provoke titters of ridicule or uproarious guffaws of laughter from anyone.

2015’s winner was Rosie Batty, a woman who came to fame as a campaigner against domestic violence after she allowed her son to be taken care of by his homicidal, child porn watching, serial rapist psychopath of a father with totally unforeseeable results.

2014’s winner was Adam Goodes, an Australian Rules footballer of part-Aboriginal descent who wisely pointed out the racism of all the malicious evil white Australians who had cheered him adoringly and paid him millions of dollars to kick a ball around a field.

Going further back, we can’t forget the sterling winner from 2007, the greatest Australian scientist since that bloke who did Penicillin: Tim Flannery. The man who managed to look through a microscope or something and predicted the weather of the future.

He plays guitar so Muslims must be cool.
He plays guitar so Muslims must be cool.

I think we can all agree that Waleed Aly, Cricket Tragic, guitar player, Gold Logie winner, University Professor, Leftist Pet and Explainer-of-why-latest-Muslim-atrocity-is-really-our-fault deserves to reside alongside such titans of our national story as the awardees listed above.

But sadly this year it was not to be.

Waleed, who had justly joined the short list in his home state of Victoria, was pipped at the post by some nobody with the implausible name of Paris Aristotle.

Apparently he does something with Refugees.

Since the National award can only be chosen from amongst the State award winners, barring a miracle this year is not Waleed’s year.

This is of course a travesty.

As regular readers of XYZ would know, here at the home of honest and open reporting we have documented the highs and lows of Waleed’s public life, his struggles, his pitfalls, and his occasional triumphs.

In https://xyz.net.au/malcolm-roberts-bells-waleed-aly-cat/

Fact https://xyz.net.au/waleed-aly-oppressed-man-australia/

We https://xyz.net.au/food-thought-waleed-aly-wins-gold-disease/

May https://xyz.net.au/micro-aggressing-waleed/

Talk https://xyz.net.au/no-waleed-things-really-talk/

About https://xyz.net.au/food-thought-waleed-scared/

Him https://xyz.net.au/say-picture-waleedtv/

Too https://xyz.net.au/get-a-grip-waleed/

Much… https://xyz.net.au/night-donald-dakked-waleed/

But who can blame us?

Who can resist the smoky-eyed charm of the diminutive scold who helpfully and dutifully points out the flaws in our society and its people on a week-nightly basis?

Well, the Victorian Australian of the Year committee, it seems.

But don’t worry, Waleed – there’s always next year.

We’ll be barracking for you here at XYZ!

Your time will come!

Photo by cedarsx