Breaking: Branson finds Allah, sells Virgin..


14116598128_8dee24b6c1_Virgin-airlinesIn exclusive breaking news, The XYZ can reveal that Sir Dick Branson has sold Virgin after finding Allah, changed his name to Mohammad Islam and released a statement that he was a terrible sinner with his Virgin business.. and that only Allah is in the virgin business!

“After spending a week in a chair with the new London mayor he showed me how off the track I was, and that unless I turned to Allah I would lose my head,” he said candidly at this morning’s press conference.

“My airlines will now only be for the use of putting those filthy Westerners and Christians and Jews (he spits after naming these) in their place in holy fire and tortured metal. May Allah judge them.”

He later said, after the press conference, that he has been so inspired by our culturally and politically diverse mayor that he needs to go to Syria and assist the forces bringing the peace of Allah.

One head at a time.

Photo by ATom.UK