Obama to launch “Office of Best Friends”

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President Barack Obama has today announced that he will be launching an “Office of Best Friends”, a spokesman for the President said today.

“The relationship between best friends is one that has been marginalised by society, and it is high time for the community to give best friends the recognition they deserve.”

“It is unfair that heterosexual and same-sex marriages are recognised by the community and the state, but best friendships are not,” the spokesman said.

“It is long overdue for the prejudice against those in best friendships to end, and for them to get the full dignity and status they deserve.”

“The Obama Administration believes that the establishing of the Office of Best Friends will achieve this, enabling citizens to register their best friendships, giving them full and equal rights and recognition in the eyes of the law and society”, the spokesman for the Obama Administration said.

The Obama Administration has been criticised by some members of the community who have stated that the proposed introduction of the Office of Best Friends will lead to unnecessary intrusion into people’s private lives, and may erode the rights of those who are not best-friend attracted.

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However, President Obama’s spokesman hit back at these claims, stating that these comments sadly reflected best-friendphobia which needed to be stamped out of the community.

Furthermore, the spokesman stated that the Office of Best Friends will only affect those in best friendships, and will not have any impact on other members of the community.

XYZ.