Roosh has published a short article which is a rethinking of a book he wrote with advice to women on how to find a man. In the piece he reassesses his previous thinking post facto his own spiritual awakening. I consider it to be the best thing he has written since re-launching his website. One thing that I will give Roosh is his ability to clearly examine his previous held beliefs and to objectively pull them apart. It makes for interesting reading.
But I found his contemplation on men choosing to opt out of the dating and marriage market to be the most valuable for this corner of the internet.
And you should leave those men alone. Let them remain single and shout to the world that divorce is unfair and life is stacked against them while they pursue fornication or masturbation. Since the fall of Adam and Eve, life has been difficult for both men and women. Traps set by the demons are all around us, but those traps should not stop us from serving God in one of His most important sacraments: marriage. A man who is scared of marriage because of divorce has put worldly concerns above trust in God. He has no faith that God will deliver him from any future tribulation, and is more concerned with his money and comforts.
This is so refreshing to hear in this context. I have long held no cause with the MGTOWs and their ilk. I personally understand from my own experience that there is a time of grieving and loss when a marriage ends. But eventually you have to get on with things. Writers and commentators that encourage men to not enter the marriage or dating market in the first place are only encouraging defeatism. That is not a path of men. We take risks. Perhaps there will be a reward, and perhaps not. Perhaps the decision to take a risk; to place your trust in events outside your control; to deal with the issues and problems that arise; to taste failure and despair; to pick yourself up and move on and risk again, all of these events contribute to create you as a man in a physical and spiritual sense.
You are the sum of the lessons you have learnt from your experiences. And often the lessons best learnt are those that have the most bitter taste.
Let’s say I get married to a Christian woman and she later becomes influenced by Satan and divorces me. She takes my house and most of my money. Should I curse God for this misfortune? Quite the opposite. I should thank Him for putting me through a trial that is designed to deepen my faith in a way that only God knows. Perhaps I would have sacrificed my salvation if I had stayed with that woman. Perhaps the house and money distanced me from God in a way I couldn’t see. Besides, why did I accumulate so many possessions? Is it through serving God that a man’s fortune is amassed? If I marry a woman who I believe is sent by God, and she later divorces me, I have nothing to lament, for that is God’s will. The problem is therefore not unfair divorce laws, or that marriage is rigged against men, but a lack of faith. Christian men should not let Caesar’s laws prevent them from serving God through marriage, an institution that He created for us.
I look back on my own life, a fair part of which lies exposed in my books, and all of the ups and downs have contributed to making me as I stand today. One of the very biggest downs in my life, my divorce, directly led to me returning to the Catholic Church. What I lost thus pales into insignificance with what I gained. There was a moment, a very brief moment in that awful time when I seriously contemplated choosing relief in the form of the bottle. I chose to reject that temptation. And after, I gained something far more valuable.
We will all receive trials and tribulations, but it is how we each deal with those predicaments and how we rise above them that separate us. In the end the choices are glory or destruction.
MGTOW not only chooses destruction, it then seeks to drag in other men so that misery can find solace in company. It is an existence without hope. It is a state that is not worthy of men. Seek to surround yourself with men who rise above their moments of great testing. Ultimately, you must become that kind of man yourself. We can all choose. Every moment every day we can choose. Choose, wisely.
Originally published at Pushing Rubber Downhill. You can purchase Adam’s books here.
