Henry Armitage
The Australian of the Year Awards, which are sponsored by a bunch of pozzed corporations including a bank and a halal supermarket, have come and gone. Can you remember the names of those brave pathfinders showing us the way to a less White, more female-dominated future?
Or were they as forgettable as the last Triple J Hottest 100?
This year the main prize has gone to a woman physicist because…well, let’s let her femsplain it to us herself:
In addition to her role as one of the world’s top scientists, Professor Simmons is an advocate for young girls who also want to pursue a career in science and technology.
“Throughout my career, I found people often underestimate female scientists,” she said.
“In some ways for me that has been great, it has meant I have flown under the radar and have been able to get on with things. [But] I’m also conscious when a person starts to believe in what others think of them, that can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
“That is why I feel it is important not to be defined by other people’s expectations of who you are and what you might be.
“Women think differently and that diversity is invaluable to technological and research development.”
Yeah, without women like James Watt there would have been no Industrial Revolution! Without gal-pals like Crick and Watson, we would never have sequenced the human genome…
Then there’s the maths teacher Eddie Woo who won second place, basically for being an ingratiating, spiky-haired chinkboy who uses ICT in innovative, engaging ways to engage diverse learners in learning activities. In other words, he makes Youtube videos. Woo-hoo!
“The title I’m most proud of, even on a night like this, is being a teacher. That’s what makes my heart tick. That’s what I want to do.”
The old Geezer award goes to Fucking White Male scientist Dr Graham Farquhar for (a) plugging holes in the global warming hoax (while genetically engineering franken-crops as a spinoff project), and (b) presumably making way for some empowered, preferably non-White womyn to replace him.
Get this:
“His work has improved world food security by developing strains of wheat that can grow with far less water, and has also helped to solve mysteries about why clouds and wind patterns were not changing as climate change models suggested they should.”
Finally, we’ve got the brown Australian of the year:
“In addition to Kerr’s on-field prowess, her work as an advocate for women’s sports was a big part of why she was recognised.”
Yes, they’re saying it’s female.
At a time when Australia’s national day is under attack for hurting aboiginal feelings, the Australian of the Year Awards show us what it really means to be Australian.
Next year let’s see if we can find one single messianic figure who fits this description: half-brown, half Asian female (trans preferred) who engages multiracial learners with quirky, tech-savvy STEM content having something to do with climate change, while headbutting soccer balls through the glass ceiling.
We’ve got 12 months to find xer, so let’s get started.
Australia deserves nothing less.