Dear reader, it is with a heavy heart that I must inform you the end is nigh. Myself and many of my fellow climate change scientist priests at the CSIRO may be defunded, unless the ABC can save the day.
It is an outrage.
If we cannot continue to ensure the science is settled, then what is the Earth to do? It will self combust and melt and flood and have plague and pestilence, it’s all there in the Book of Apocalypse at the end of the Copenhagen report into why climate zealots need to continue to be funded.
Now, the CSIRO lead heretic thinks we should be doing something about the climate change we are saying is real, but we are scientists, not doers. We want you all to keep the faith, and to do that we need to preach, measure, tweek data, fly around the world, attend conferences, hotels, do our bit to make sure the science stays settled!
Dear people, for the love of Gaia, keep us funded, because we are useless in the real world, dodo scientists, and I am scared.