Breaking – shocking revelation as Australian man gets legless drunk on Australia Day

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In a shocking development it has been revealed that a Sydney rugby player got pissed on Australia Day and behaved like a jerk. The captain of the Roosters rugby league team, Mitchell Pearce, was filmed in a private home legless. Apparen12642769_10156478463340300_4838582318859705666_ntly he urinated on a couch, hassled a woman for a kiss, and simulated sex with a poodle, all in the same private home.

Unfortunately for him, he was filmed whilst committing these acts in said private home. This led to whole page newspaper stories, interviews with stern-faced rugby officials doing their very best to look shocked, and a disapproving lecture from the pulpit of A Current Affair.

The RSPCA people even got in on the act (so to speak), calling for a fourteen year jail term for committing a lewd act (albeit a simulated one) with a dog. For its part the poodle concerned was, however, unharmed and not pressing charges, but was said to be ‘fine with it.’ Not so every po-faced media type, present day wowser, and preachy social commentator.

What a revelation. Men behave like idiots when legless and are prone to make d!ckheads of themselves. Even rugby players, and yes, even the captain. Should he have been more responsible? Of course. Did he think he might be filmed making a jerk of himself in a private home? Probably not, if he was thinking at all. Was it an invasion of his privacy? Yes. Haven’t we all been that drunk? You can answer that one….