Saint Cecil


In breaking news, unverified reports from the Congo indicate that Cecil the lion has appeared in the over a remote village. One resident, speaking via a scratchy Skype connection, likened the manifestation of Cecil in the clouds to that of Mustapha in The Lion King. Local officials hope the remote site will one day become a place of pilgrimage, like Lourdes.

The world has been greatly distressed by the untimely death, in fact, the martyrdom of Cecil the lion.

The XYZ has had further unverified reports of members of the public feeling the spiritual presence of Cecil, and experiencing visions and apparitions of the saintly lion.

Whilst saints of old could be canonised by general acclamation, the Catholic Church nowadays requires holy men, women, and lions to have at least two verifiable miracles in order to be formally recognised as saints.

Your XYZ, in our desire to serve the community, is keen to petition Pope Francis to have Cecil formally recognised amongst the eternal communion of saints.

Holy Father, we humbly submit that henceforth, the Feast Day of Saint Cecil, Lion and Martyr, be a Holy Day across the catholic world, and among public broadcasters across the globe.

If you have experienced any miracles from Cecil the lion, or know someone who has, please contact us immediately at your XYZ.

St Cecil, pray for us, now and at the hour of our need.


This piece is a follow up post to our previous article: