University politics matters

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It has come to the attention of The XYZ that sometime in the very recent past, a brave band of freedom fighters managed to avoid the ever present eye of Big Brother and distribute anti-socialist propaganda deep in the heart of enemy territory: Sydney.

Our source tells us that socialists were busy for several days, scurrying around in a vain attempt to find them all, to either remove, deface, or destroy the dangerous, potentially viral memes of their enemy.

It is believed that these posters were themselves parodies of posters intended to advertise a Stalinist conference in Sydney, which makes the attempts to deface them even more hilarious.

This is just the latest in a series of poster runs by patriots and anti-communists in Australia this year. This magnificent specimen was just one of a bunch produced by Aussie Nationalists in Sydney.

Perhaps the simplest, yet funniest, was a prank at Monash University in Melbourne, where Chinese students were informed by posters, in atrocious Mandarin, that they would be deported if they entered the Student Union Building.

Now, it is easy to dismiss these sorts of pranks as “university politics”, as distinct from “serious politics”, but this misses an important point. One of the defining moments which spurred me to political action was seeing how the most insane, fringe academic ideas when I was at university in the late nineties and early noughties worked their way to the forefront of the political battlefield in the current year.

One of the most memorable jokes I ever heard was made at a comedy night at Melbourne University in 2003 by a bloke whom, aside from doing an excellent impersonation of Hughesy, appeared to subscribe to all the correct leftie views of the time. He made the following observation:

“I was in the toilet the other day, and I read some graffiti on the dunny door that said “Do you know that you are being gendered right now?” Then I looked down into the toilet bowl’ and a miniature feminist was cutting my dick off.”

The place erupted, and the purple haired land whale who came to the bar at that exact moment did not look impressed at my own mirth.  He’d get off lightly with a public disemboweling these days.

The point of this is, the left never stops. Universities groom young Marxists to always be on the lookout for the next minority cause, and if it doesn’t exist, to invent it. They are trained, (who am I kidding, even before they get to university) to twist every act, every word you say, into a form of oppression. Universities incubate the crazy ideas which the radicals of tomorrow will force down the throats of ordinary people with the lines, “why are we still discussing this”, “it will be an issue until it is dealt with”, and the old favourite, “it’s the current year”.

Pranks such as those carried out by our dear freedom fighters in Sydney retake political space from the crazy leftists. It subverts Marxist dominance of the discourse, and is a reassurance to the silent, sensible majority that they are not crazy, they really are the majority. They are a sign that the fight to retake the university, already well under way in America, is revving up downunder.

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David Hiscox
David has studied history and political science at Melbourne University. His thesis was written on how the utilisation of Missile Defence can help to achieve nuclear disarmament. His interest in history was piqued by playing a flight simulator computer game about the Battle of Britain, and he hopes to one day siphon the earnings from his political writings into funding the greatest prog-rock concept album the world has ever seen.